Using a non-judgmental, compassionate approach, we help our clients Listen And Sense Each Reaction (LASER). We use mindfulness, needs-focused connection, and a parts informed approach to help you on your journey. What does this approach look like?

Mindfulness is awareness of our internal states and surroundings that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally. Often when people hear “mindfulness,” they equate it with meditation, and this is one form of mindfulness. We’re not talking specifically about meditation here, although if you want to and enjoy meditation, that’s certainly a useful practice.

We’re talking about your creating a space for yourself, wherever you are, where you can be present and “hear” the thoughts and sensations that bubble up in your body and mind. Sometimes you may use grounding exercises to help get to that place where you can be present. We want you to get to the place where you can be in the present moment so you can have the gift of attending to what’s going on outside of yourself and inside of yourself. You’ll learn how to “name it to tame it.” You’ll benefit from the opportunity to make conscious choices — to move from reaction to response.

Needs-Focused Connection is a way of connecting to yourself (or your Self) that focuses on what universal needs are and aren’t being met for you at that moment. By connecting to those needs, you’ll be able to respond to rather than react to life’s situations and come up with strategies that are more life serving for you.

Parts Informed Understanding is a way of looking at parts of ourselves. For example, parts of you may want to stop smoking, while other parts of us may not want to. For those of you who love the show and film “Fiddler on the Roof,” remember the character Tevye posing a thought, contemplating, and then saying, “On the other hand…”? Each part had a different lens, a different belief construct, a different value, a different way of looking at the world, and different considerations. How could Tevye listen to these parts and perhaps even have a compassionate conversation with them?

Tevye had, what we call call, polarized parts. All of our parts don’t always work in alignment with each other, so often we have clients who say, “I don’t understand it. I want to quit. So, why do I keep lighting up? It makes no sense.” Well, actually, it makes a lot of sense. It’s important, though, to listen to all your parts compassionately so that they’re all comfortable, or at least in agreement, with your quit goals.

We like to say that all parts are welcome and all parts are well-intentioned, even though sometimes their strategies aren’t so helpful. So, we listen and talk with these parts who have taken on certain burdens and thus beliefs, and with their consent share with them what’s going on with us us and sometimes help them to update their timeline and their strategies.

These parts tend to get stuck in time, so if they came up with the strategy when they were young children, that’s pretty much the sophistication of the strategies they came up with and that’s where they stay. To tie it in with needs-focused relating (self connection), the conflict isn’t in the universal needs, it’s in the strategies we come up with to meet those needs.

Through listening, exercises, and providing you with tools, we help you understand what’s going on with your quit and support you on your journey as you work towards becoming a contented and happy nonsmoker.